RIGOR MORTIS

Directed by Juno Mak

Written By Philip Yung

Jill Leung

Juno Mak

Starring Chin Siu-ho

Anthony Chan

Kara Hui

Lo Hoi-panh

Paw Hee-Ching

Rigor Mortis is a Hong Kong horror film. Despite that it does use some typical Asian horror motifs, this is a really good, creepy and entertaining horror film.

A down-on-his-luck, depressed and suicidal actor, Chin Sio-Ho, moves into a dilapidated apartment building and comes face to face with twin ghosts, a vampire hunter, a black magic practitioner and an elderly women trying to resurrect her dead husband. A resurrection that only succeeds in him becoming a vampire (the Chinese variation, not European).

Rigor Mortis achieves three things many horror films do not. It maintains a level creepiness throughout the movie. It never forgets it is a horror film. It has a number of good to excellent performances from the cast.

How many horror films can you actually praises the cast?

The script is good, the acting is good and it never devolves into a gore fest, plus it keeps up a heavy dose of ‘what-is-going-on’ up until the ending.

FINAL VIEW: See this film, especially if you are a horror or Asian film fan.

RATING: 7

Jupiter Ascending

Written and Directed by The Wachowskis

Starring Mila Kunis
Channing Tatum
Sean Bean

This is going to be a harsh review, and probably not very long. Hell I could probably review Jupiter Ascending in one word: Crap.

When I first saw the trailer on Hulu, I was hyped to see this. I made one major mistake though. I didn’t bother to see who made the film. Once in my seat in theaters, my heart sank when I saw the name Wachowski. I thought about leaving, but I had my popcorn and soda in hands, and I figured I would give them the benefit of the doubt.

Bad Move.

Jupiter Ascending is a beautiful looking film, but that is it.

In Jupiter Ascending the Earth is being prepared for harvesting by an alien Corporation. Said harvesting is paused when it is discovered that Jupiter Jones (Mila Kunis) is the reconvergence (a fancy, complicated and stupid way the film describes reincarnation) of the Queen.

The Queen’s three children vie for control of Jupiter, with one planning on marrying her! Through in Caine Wise (Channing Tatum) as a protector and we have . . . something.

Beyond great effects and high production value the film is a total waste. The plot is muddled and never quite clear, the characters are all one-dimensional, dialog is piss poor and Sean Bean is wasted in a throw-away role.

Seriously, Sean Bean’s role of Stinger could be cut from the movie and it would be an improvement. Who uses Sean Bean like that?

The entire story is so by-the-numbers is it stupid. Of course we know when Jupiter Jones meets Cain Wise they are eventually going to fall in love, what the hell else are they going to do? In addition to that the film is poorly paced with overdone and over long action scenes that actual bore.

I have heard people say that this film had everything but the kitchen sink. I disagree. It not only had the kitchen sink, it hit the viewers over the head with it.

Jupiter Ascending can best be described as a crap mash-up of dozens of superior Sci-fi movies, TV shows, comics and novels.

Well, at least the popcorn and soda were good.

FINAL THOUGHT: Skip this film, read a sci-fi book instead. Hell, take a bowl movement, that will be more entertaining.

RATING: 3

UPSIDE DOWN

Directed by Juan Diego Solanas

Starring Jim Sturgess, Kirsten Dunst

When I first found out about Upside Down, I was looking forward to seeing it. The idea intrigued me. When I finally sat down and watch the movie this past week, the intriguing idea seemed to fade away.

The idea of twin planets with opposite pulls of gravity seemed nice, the execution of this seemed off. One planet was on top of the other and you could crossed between them using a building called TransWorld.

There is even a scene where the worlds are crossed using a rope. Even for Science-Fiction I found this far-fetched, what about the void of space in between? Maybe I just missed something.

The other thing that faded this concept for me was the story and plot. Instead of exploring and exploiting the Twin Worlds concept to reveal how people lived in this unique way, they used the concept to tell a generic romantic comedy story.

In fact, this film faded so quickly for me it is another unfinished viewing. Around 40 minutes in I stopped caring and stopped watching. Nothing was happened, other than a late twenty-something guy, pawning over a girl he once knew ten years before and coming up with elaborate schemes to see her.

Sorry but this was not a good use of this concept. Furthermore, there was nothing in the script or characters to get emotionally invested in.

The visuals are stunning though, points for that.

FINAL VIEW: Wasted opportunity.

RATING: INCOMPLETE

THE FOUR

Directed by Gordon Chan and Janet Chun

Starring Deng Chao
               Liu Yifei
               Collin Chou
               Ronald Cheng
               Anthony Wong

The Four is a highly entertaining Chinese Martial Arts Super Hero Film. If the subtitle translation is correct, there are even references to ‘super powers’ and ‘heroes’ in the film.

Lead by Master Zhuge Zhenswo, The Divine Constabulary of Emotionless, Life Stealer, Iron Hands and the newly recruited Cold Blood investigate an influx of counterfeit coins into the economy. Their investigation leads them to but heads with Department Six, and into conflict with a powerful villain using magic to raise an army of the dead.

Visually the film is stunning, and the effects for each character’s powers are superb.
One of the true highlights of the film is the acting. I didn’t witness what I would call a bad performance by any of the main leads. Which is extremely good in this case, as the acting at times made up for some weak characterization on certain characters.
While entertaining, The Four does have some flaws, mostly with the script. The plot is good and the story solid. The problems come into play with the characterization and the breakneck pacing.

Life Snatcher, Master Zhuge and the villain, are the most fleshed out and well-rounded characters. Others lean more toward stock characters then actually characters. But as mentioned above, the good performances by the actors, save the characters.

The Pacing is the biggest flaw in the film, it causes certain parts of the film to feel a little choppy and some of the underlying relationships to feel rushed. This is a script issues, as it wasn’t quiet developed out enough.

Despite these flaws, I enjoyed The Four, and will be on the lookout for Part II and III, in what I have learned is a trilogy.

FINAL VIEW: The Four benefits from excellent filmmaking that helps to make the differences and almost overcome shortcomings in the script. It would rate higher if the script was a little stronger.

RATING: 6

The Phantom Punch

I wrote in my intro post that I would write/review even films I didn’t finish. Of course I can’t write a full review, but I can write about what I did watch and why I stopped.
This is my first such piece, so join me for a brief time on an unfinished journey called The Phantom Punch, directed by Robert Townsend and starring Ving Rhames as Sonny Liston.

The Phantom Punch is supposed to be the story of Sonny Liston’s life. If someone’s life can be told via note cards. Instead of a coherent film that tells a story, The Phantom Punch is more like a series of unrelated vignettes, or a ‘80s style 90-second montage dragged out to 90 minutes.

There are three major issues with The Phantom Punch. The first is the above mentioned incoherently. The second is Ving Rhames himself. He is a great choice to play an older Liston, but a 20-year old Liston? A fifty year old Rhames plays Liston at 20, 40 and beyond. This means Liston never ages over the course of his life in the film. Just Bad.

The third issue is this, Liston seems like an afterthought in a movie that is supposed to be about his life. If a movie about Sonny Liston’s life seems uninterested about Sonny Liston, how can a viewer be interested? I doubt that changed in the second half of the movie I didn’t watch.

The Wikipedia entry for Sonny Liston is more engrossing.

The Final View: Give this movie a pass, read Wikipedia instead.

Rating: Incomplete.

Adventures of Adele Blanc-Sec

This movie pissed me the hell off, and not for the reasons one might expect.

You won’t see me write something like that very often.

I recently watched Adele Blanc-Sec on Amazon Instant Video, after wanting to see it for quite some time. It is based upon a comic book/graphic novel series out of France that started back in the seventies.

It stars Louise Bourgoin as Adele Blanc-Sec, directed by Luc Besson.

Louise Bourgoin is the best thing about this film, and she does her best to save it in its dying third act.

So what about this movie pissed me off? Well, let me tell you.

I loved the first thirty-five minutes of this move. Loved it. Even if the plot of the film was unclear and Adele’s motivation was unclear. The first thirty-five minutes were so good and well done, I believed that everything would become clear in the second half.

Boy, was I wrong.

The first half of the film showcases Adele as an intelligent supreme adventurer that can overcome any obstacle with ease.

The second half of the film shows a completely different version of Adele. One who is a fool that can’t seem to do anything right, and it turns out what we thought she did right in the first half was horribly wrong. Any signs of intelligence also slips away in the second half as the script devolves into a mess.

Everything starts to unravel at the half way point during an overlong segment which sees Adele try to rescue a Professor from death row. This segment is long, overdone and boring. Here Adele dawns a number of different disguises to rescue the Professor, only to be caught every time and escorted from the prison. Why she is never arrested, is puzzling.

The movie, nor Adele herself, recovers after this segment.

When it comes to Adventures of Adele Blanc-Sec, Luc Besson is like a prizefighter who puts together a great game plan, but forgets how to throw the knockout punch.
FINAL VIEW: Mixed. There are good things about the film, just not enough. Its second half fizzled and dies long before the film ends.

Worth a look for those who are curious, but ultimately an average film one won’t miss.

RATING: 4.75

Little Big Soldier

The first thing I want to mention is that I am not a big Hong Kong movie fan, nor a big martial arts movie fan. Do I like some Hong Kong movies? Of Course. Do I like some martial arts movies? Of course. As a general rule though I am not a fan boy who think that everything in those genres is ‘cool’ and ‘awesome.’

Here is the odd thing, even though Little Big Soldier is marketed (in North America) as a martial arts movie, it isn’t. It is a historical drama that includes action, adventure, martial arts and humor.

What Little Big Solider is, is an excellent movie. It is easily Jackie Chan’s finest film in two decades, which he also wrote and produced.

Everything in this film balances near perfectly. The structure is dead on and the pace is even and flows like a cool stream. This all comes into place because of a well written screenplay that tells a great story, and stellar direction by Sheng Ding.

Little Big Soldier take place during the Warring States period of Chine and tells the tale of an older Soldier (Chan), who captures a high-ranking General (Leehom Wang) in hopes of gaining a reward.

The true gem of this film is the relationship that builds between Chan and Wang, and how neither man is ever sure of what that relationship is.

And, of course, there are the martial art fight scenes that can only be praised.

Little Big Solider is One Big Film.

Final View: This is required viewing for all. The fact that it wasn’t nominated for the 2010 Academy Award for Best Foreign Language film is a joke.

Hulu, Amazon, NetFlix, Red Box, or Fry’s Electronics for $2.99, make it a New Year Resolution to see Little Big Soldier.

Rating: 8

WHAT IS WHAT I WATCH I REVIEW?

Hello All,

Welcome to my new blog “What I Watch I Review.” This new blog . . .  well ‘faux’ new blog really. I originally launched this blog on January 1st of 2014. I never did write for it because a brain aneurysm sideline the year 2014.

Everything is good now though, and effective immediately today, Thursday, January 1, writing for this blog commences.

Okay, so back to “What I Watch I Review.” It is exactly as it is title. This is a blog where I will review, comment and discuss materials that I watch. Movies, documentaries and the occasional TV show.

I will focus mostly on movie commentary and reviews. Don’t expect a lot of current run theatrical reviews unless I see the movie while in theaters.

I have eclectic tastes, everything from ‘art house’ fare to genre movies, foreign, silent, etc. All movies are on my plate and I will write about many of them on this blog.

In fact, my first piece will be posted tonight, as I will write about Jackie Chan’s ‘Little Big Soldier.’

At this point I plan on posting a review every two weeks, on Fridays. I may post more often, but we will so how it goes. These reviews will be between 400 and 500-words. I want to keep the reviews tight and succinct, keeping the filler limited.

As I do with my comic book blog “The Burning Mind,” I may also posted random ‘flash reviews,” which will be short 150-words or less reviews.

I won’t just write about films I enjoy, I will also write about films I don’t like, and even films I don’t finish and why.

In addition to the review/commentary pieces, I will probably also write some general film and opinion pieces, and even some rants on the film industry. This will be in addition to the reviews.

I plan my style for the blog to be more of a smooth conversational, talking style. Something that invites more interaction.

One thing I will NOT do is take pots shot or insult filmmakers or actors. Even if I hate a film, I will not spout hatred toward the filmmaker. So don’t expect that.

I also don’t expect everyone to agree with what I write. It’s all good though.

MOVIE TIME!

Ace Masters.